Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Social Experiment: While the Cat's Away

For the first time in our six year marriage, my husband is going to be gone for an entire week. Not that I won't miss him; I'm sure I will. However, I'm wondering how life will be different while I'm alone. In my mind, I'm imagining how perfect everything will be when he first steps into the house after his travels: the laundry all neatly folded and put away, the floors freshly mopped, the children peacefully reposing in their beds and the intoxicating scent of chocolate chip cookies with notes of pinesol wafting out to greet him as he opens the door. A simultaneous display of love and my independence. Yeah, right!

The reality is I am further behind than ever. He'll be lucky if the acrid smell of dirty laundry and stale bacon doesn't knock him out when he arrives home. Because the real question is, how will I be able to get anything done with just me and these kids? But hey, I'm up for the adventure; this test of my independence. So to prove my own daring, I have arranged a checklist of things I am going to attempt while he is gone just to prove that I can make it on my own:

1) Hit the Clinique counter at Dillard's for Clinque Bonus Days with whatever kids are in tow. (I'm not sure what this proves except that I know how to use the debit card. But, he probably already knows that.)

2) Go grocery shopping with the kids by myself (gulp.)

3) Make a giant shoe cake.

4) Find and hang new kitchen curtains. (OK. I might have to find someone else to hang them. It doesn't matter, I just want them hanging there when he walks in.)

5) Clean(ish) the house. (I have three kids under the age of six so yes, this is a goal . Besides, it will show off the new curtains better.)

6) Organize the home office (this is very low priority. Dillard's or home office cleaning? See what I mean?)

7) Learn how to open the gas tank on our minivan.

Hey, it could be worse, right? He could come home to find our bedroom made over to look like Forks, Washington or that new Coach handbag I've been coveting hanging on the doorknob. So, I think he's getting off rather easy.

I'll report back on the completion of my check list one a week from now.

Update: So far my husband been gone 2 nights and the most fun I've had was staying up till 1:00 AM laughing hysterically by myself over cake wrecks. I'm not complaining; that really is my idea of a good time. What would you do if your husband were away?


mim said...

Party on dude! I'm joinin' ya soon.

Aston said...

So I had to find out what cake wrecks was all about. I laughed really hard. Some of those are just too funny. I say live it up while you are being tortured by having the kids all alone without any breaks... yikes that sounds bad. Thank goodness you have such great kids. Send them down here for a few hours to give yourself a break. My kids would love it! That way you can get those curtains up and get started on chocolate chip cookies filling the house with the perfect homemaker aroma. I'm serious ... call me or I'm just coming down to get them tomorrow.

Carroll said...

I read your blog again, it is beautifully written, I just wish you had more time for you.

Tova Darling said...

Having just read your blog for the very first time, I'm totally amused that number 3 on your list is "Make a giant shoe cake." I'm sure it makes sense in the context of your life, but it's really, really funny with no context!

Have a great day!

A said...

During the summer my husband was gone and at first I was a wreck. But the truth is I settled into a nice routine of reading at night, eating in bed and wishing he was home. It turns out he's part of me in a good way, but keep the Dillard's thing on the list and just hurry and clean right before he gets back!

Marie said...

Come on over, girls. We'll party down!

Anonymous said...

Can I just say that the Cake Wrecks blog is utter hilarity? Thank you. =D